The Feast in Defeat (DeFeast Ninang?)

The Feast in Defeat
People can easily write about victory and achievements but who will write about losing? Who would want to reveal any weakness? Who in fact will be inspired by people not making it? We feel uncomfortable when people talk about failing an exam, repeating a grade level, losing a contest, or not finishing college. Unless you’re that kind who basks in another’s misery.. until of course you realize your own.

To write or not to write about losing may be a question. But to experience defeat is inevitable. Everybody loses sometime. How we take it is what sets the stage for our future. I believe winning is also inevitable for those who never give up.

Many people have complemented me recently about how academically good my kids are– most probably from my Facebook posts of medals and accolades. I would like to say my children had at least equal, if not more, losses and disappointments as they have awards and rewards; but they will probably think it’s false modesty. But that’s the truth, losing is as real to my kids as winning. And though it actually hurts, I would tell them to continue to be grateful, just look forward to the next opportunity (they always come for all- sometimes big, sometimes small), keep trying  and giving their best (always with prayer and dependence on God’s grace..Ora et Labora Ninang? ) And always ultimately for God’s Glory (That in all things God may be glorified Ninang? “Go St. Scho!” 😋. ) Each defeat can prepare people for victory when they respond humbly and appropriately in a way that is pleasing to God.

Is there really something to rejoice about failures (is there ‘feast’ in defeat Ninang?). Well you’re still alive for one (If you’re not, then not being able to feel the emotional pain is another 😬). You won’t be busy saying so many thank you’s to well-wishers (probably more privacy?). It would be less stressful to try the next time (the pressure is on the defending champion!).

Kidding aside, the feast in defeat is the promise of a bigger plan– a plan to mold your character, to teach a lesson, to prepare a future. The feast in defeat is the assurance of unconditional love (from God and family), unabated support, and persistent confidence. The Joy in defeat is knowing you are loved not because of what you can do or who you have made yourself to be, but for simply being you. God loves you always. And for our kids, we love you always. And for others who don’t hear or feel it from their family, you have to trust they do.

Everybody loves a “winner,” but a “loser” is loved by people who count most in life. And sometimes it’s worth knowing. So win or lose, hold your head high. In victory or defeat, flash that big smile. Better days beckon.
This article is for losers
At least once we have been
This piece is for the brave
At least who tried again

We will not be mocked
Though we’ve been in shock (Funny, Ninang!)
For life goes on and we live on
Wiser, willing, hopeful

We are loved!
We are loved!
We are loved!

– Ninang thoughts while waiting for youngest child from a math competition

“..but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8)

“I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

“The Lord upholds all those who fall
and lifts up all who are bowed down.” (Psalms 145:14)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

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